Insights

Which three situations in Ningbo can require the return of bride price

Ningbo Author：LuXu WANG

bride price disputes are the high-frequency type in marriage and family cases: if both parties fail to get married after paying the bride price, or divorce soon after marriage, whether and how much the bride price can be returned is the most concerned issue of the parties. According to Article 5 of the Interpretation (I) of the Supreme People's Court on the Application of the Marriage and Family Code of the the People's Republic of China Civil Code, the three legal circumstances for requesting the return of the bride price are: the two parties have not gone through the marriage registration procedures; the two parties have gone through the marriage registration procedures but have not lived together; The payment before marriage leads to difficulties for the payer (the latter two items are conditional on the divorce of both parties). The "Provisions of the Supreme People's Court on Several Issues Concerning the Application of Law in the Trial of Cases Involving Bifu Disputes" (Law Interpretation [2024] No. 1), which came into effect on February 1, 2024, added two more discretionary situations: those who have registered for marriage and live together But those who live together for a short period of time and the amount of betrothal gifts can be returned as appropriate; those who have not registered for marriage but have lived together shall live together. Conclusion: Whether the bride price can be refunded depends on the four variables of "registration, living together, amount of bride price and living difficulties". General gifts during love do not belong to bride price and cannot be returned.

1. Analysis of the requirements for the three statutory return scenarios

Article 5 of the Interpretation (I) of the Supreme People's Court on the Application of the Marriage and Family Code of the the People's Republic of China Civil Code stipulates that if a party requests the return of the bride price paid in accordance with the custom, the people's court shall support it if the following circumstances are found: the (I) parties have not gone through the marriage registration procedures; the (II) parties have gone through the marriage registration procedures but have not lived together; the pre-marital payment is (III) and leads to difficulties for the payer. The application of the provisions of items 2 and 3 of the preceding paragraph shall be conditional on the divorce of both parties.

Item-by-item disassembly requirements:

  1. No marriage registration has been completed: In cases where the engagement has not been fulfilled and the parties have not registered their marriage, the return of betrothal gifts is generally supported. However, it should be noted that this situation is to be distinguished from "unregistered but living together", which applies article 6 of the bride price provision and is based on the circumstances of the common life, rather than being returned in full.
  2. Registered marriage but did not live together: must prove "did not live together"-obtained the certificate but did not actually live together, live together. This is conditional on divorce, I .e. the payer may request a refund only when the payer files a divorce lawsuit (or a counterclaim/claim in a divorce lawsuit filed by the other party).
  3. Premarital benefits cause hardship for payer:"living difficulties" means that the local basic living standard cannot be maintained by relying on personal property and the property acquired at the time of divorce, which must be supported by evidence such as income proof, debt proof, family expenses, etc., rather than only by oral statement; divorce is also a condition.

From the perspective of historical evolution, these three items are the rules established in the period of "(II) of Interpretation of Marriage Law", and the civil code era is continued by the fifth article of the (I) of Interpretation. The purpose of this provision is to establish the minimum threshold for cases in which restitution should be ordered; the 2024 regulations on betrothal gifts further refine the scope for judicial discretion, shifting the adjudication framework from a strict “all-or-nothing” approach to a more comprehensive, discretionary assessment.

2. Two types of discretionary circumstances under the new 2024 betrothal gift regulations

Regulations on the bride price Article 5: If both parties have registered for marriage and lived together, the people's court generally does not support the request of one party to return the bride price paid according to the custom when divorcing; however, if the time of living together is short and the amount of the bride price is too high, the people's court can comprehensively consider the amount of the bride price, the situation of living together and gestation, the fault of both parties and other facts according to the actual dowry, determine whether to return and the specific percentage of return, taking into account local customs. Article 6: If the two parties have not registered their marriage but have lived together, and one party requests the return of the dowry paid in accordance with customs, the people's court shall, in accordance with the actual use of the dowry and the dowry, comprehensively consider the facts of living together and gestation, the fault of both parties, and in combination with local customs, determine whether to return and the specific proportion of return.

These two articles refine the referee's caliber into three levels:

  1. Registered + Living Together: The principle is not to return -- the marriage relationship has been established in substance, and the bride price is usually used for living together; only when "the time of living together is short and the amount of bride price is too high" is superimposed, the window of discretionary return will be opened.
  2. Registered + Short living time together + Excessive amount: the discretionary proportion is determined in combination with the length of living together, the situation of pregnancy, the fault of both parties, the situation of dowry, etc. How is “an excessively high amount” determined? It is assessed on a case-by-case basis, taking into account factors such as the per capita disposable income of residents in the payer’s locality, the family’s financial situation, local customs, and the actual use of the betrothal gifts; there is no uniform national standard for the amount.
  3. Unregistered + Lived together: no longer return in full, but according to the time of common life, pregnancy situation, fault and so on-the longer you live together and have children, the lower the return rate, or even no return.

At the same time, the bride price regulation defines the boundary of the scope of the bride price: the court can determine the scope of the bride price according to the purpose of one party's payment of property, considering the local customs of both parties, the time and method of payment, the value of the property, the payer and the receiver and other facts; the general gifts (holiday red envelopes, birthday gifts) and daily consumption expenses during the love period do not belong to the bride price. The beneficiary and the recipient's parents may participate as co-parties in the proceedings when the conditions are met.

Breakdown of factors and circumstances 3. the discretionary return ratio

No matter which rule is applicable, the court's discretionary return rate will revolve around five sets of facts: the length of living together, whether to have children, the relationship between the amount of bride price and the local economic level, the actual use of bride price and dowry, and the fault of both parties. Broken down by scenario, the typical handling is as follows:

  1. unregistered, not living together: in principle, the full amount or most of the return (the equipment and gifts that have been consumed together can be deducted).
  2. Not registered; broke up after living together for several months.: Discretionary return, the shorter the time of living together, the higher the proportion of return; in case of the woman's pregnancy, abortion, etc., the proportion will be reduced accordingly.
  3. Unregistered, living together for years or having given birth: Generally no return or only nominal return.
  4. "Flash away" after registration (short living time together, high bride price): Discretionary return can be claimed when divorcing, such as those who have lived together for less than a few months, hundreds of thousands of yuan of bride price and have not been pregnant.
  5. Register and live together for a long time: the principle of non-return; the payment of life difficulties can be supported as a discretionary part of the return.
  6. Asking for property through marriage: Article 1042 of the Civil Code explicitly prohibits asking for property through marriage. If it is verified to ask for property in the name of bride price, it will be dealt with through corresponding legal channels.

The issue of dowry should also be noted: the dowry situation should be taken into account when the bride price is clearly returned. The dowry that has been consumed with the common life should be deducted, and the man who receives the dowry should also be returned or offset. In litigation, each party’s respective “expenditure records” must be fully accounted for; asserting only the return of the betrothal gift while remaining silent on the dowry may skew the calculation of the refund ratio.

4. evidence list and operation steps

In disputes over betrothal gifts, the parties bearing the burden of proof—both the payer and the recipient—have different focuses:

Evidence list of payer: payment certificate of bride price (bank transfer record, receipt, matchmaker handling certificate), cash source and cash withdrawal record, chat record of both parties discussing marriage, witness testimony; For those who advocate living in difficulties, prepare income certificate, debt certificate and family expenditure record; For those who advocate living together for a short time, prepare the marriage registration time and the starting and ending evidence of actual living together.

the evidence list of the receiving party: the proof that the bride price has been used for living together (the bill for wedding expenses, the list of household appliances purchased together), the list of dowry purchase certificate and dowry, the evidence of living together and pregnancy together (the residence record, the birth certificate of children), the defense materials against "excessive amount" (local customs, the description of family economic situation).

Operation steps: first sort out the total amount of payment and the time of payment, and eliminate the general gifts and daily consumption during the love period; then determine which file rules apply according to the state of "registration + living together"; at the negotiation stage, relatives or people's mediation organizations can be entrusted to mediate and sign a written agreement; if the negotiation fails, file a marriage contract property dispute with the basic people's court of the defendant's domicile (claimed after divorce, can be dealt with together in divorce proceedings), pay attention to the claim within the statute of limitations.

Analysis of 5. Common Misunderstandings

Misunderstanding 1: "As long as you don't get a license, the bride price will be refunded in full". Error. For those who have not registered but have lived together, the proportion of return shall be determined according to Article 6 of the bride price regulations according to factors such as the time of living together, pregnancy situation, fault, etc.-the return results vary greatly between living together for several months and living together for several years, whether or not to have children, and there is no mechanical rule of "no license = full refund.

Misunderstanding 2: "If you get a license, you can never return it". Error. If a marriage is registered but does not live together, a refund may be claimed at the time of divorce (item 2 of article 5 of the (I) of interpretation); If a marriage is registered and lived together but the time is very short and the amount of bride price is obviously too high, the divorce may also claim the return as appropriate in accordance with the proviso to article 5 of the bride price provisions.

Misunderstanding 3: "The money spent during love is a bride price and you can ask for it". Error. The bride price is a large payment based on the marriage contract custom and for the purpose of concluding a marriage. Festivals, birthday gifts and daily consumption expenses are not included in the bride price (the bride price is explicitly excluded), and the transfer notes "520" and "1314" and other expressions of love are more difficult to be recognized as bride price.

Misunderstanding 4: "To receive bride price is to claim property through marriage, and you can counterclaim". Error. Asking for property through marriage is prohibited by Article 1042 of the Civil Code, but the bride price paid according to custom is different-disputes over the return of bride price shall be handled according to the above rules and should not be simply characterized as asking for property. If it is true that large amount of property is demanded in the name of bride price and the circumstances are bad, it shall be dealt with through legal channels and the return proportion may be affected by fault.

Misunderstanding 5: "The return ratio is taken by the judge casually". Error. The court's discretion is based on an examination of five sets of facts: the length of life together, the circumstances of the pregnancy, the relationship between the amount of the bride price and the local economic level, the actual use of the bride price and the dowry, and the fault of the parties. What the parties can do is to prepare the evidence of these five sets of facts-the rental contract and residence record at the beginning of the common life, the birth certificate, the bill used for the bride price, and the dowry list-the more complete the evidence, the clearer the expectation of the return ratio.

Deduction rules 6. dowry and co-consumption

The calculation for the return of betrothal gifts does not simply follow a “take as much as you received” principle; the bride’s dowry and shared expenses are the two major deductions. With regard to dowry, the dowry provision specifies that the dowry situation should be taken into account when it is returned: the part of the furniture, household appliances, vehicles, savings, etc. that have been consumed with the common life should be deducted; The dowry still kept by the man or attached to the man's property shall be returned or offset. The party claiming deduction must provide the dowry purchase certificate and list. If there is no bill supplement after marriage, witness testimony, photos and other supporting evidence may be collected. In terms of common consumption, the bride price has been used for the part of the common life of both parties (wedding banquet, common travel, common purchase of daily necessities), because both parties benefit, the return is usually not supported or deducted in proportion to the benefit. In other words, the court calculates the "net amount after deducting common consumption and dowry", and then discounts it according to factors such as common life time and fault-the payer should first calculate the net amount before suing, and the receiver should compile the dowry and common consumption vouchers into a book, and the completeness of the evidence of both parties directly determines the range of the return ratio.

also need to remind the risk of cash payment: if the bride price is delivered in cash, if there is no receipt, matchmaker's testimony or cash withdrawal record, the fact of payment itself may be difficult to prove. For large dowry payments, be sure to transfer the funds via bank and clearly mark the remittance as “dowry,” or have the matchmaker handle the transaction and provide a receipt, to avoid disputes over whether the payment was made. In litigation involving cash payments, the burden of proof typically requires establishing a chain of evidence by demonstrating that the timing of the cash withdrawal coincides with the engagement date, corroborating testimony from the matchmaker, and acknowledging the amounts in the chat records.

Class Case Reference: Ningbo Haishu District People's Court (2024) Zhejiang 0203 Minchu No. 1317 Case, the man paid dowry 88000 yuan and hardware 50000 yuan, both parties did not register their marriage and did not live together. The court found that the purpose of payment failed and ordered the full return of 138000 yuan. The 35 cigarettes claimed by the man were not supported due to insufficient evidence. This case is a typical example falling under the statutory category of “no marriage registration having been completed.” Trial Court: Ningbo Haishu District People's Court Case No.:(2024) Zhejiang 02

03Minchu No. 1317

7. Frequently Asked Questions

Can the entire betrothal gift be refunded as long as the marriage hasn’t taken place?

Not necessarily. For those who have not registered but have lived together, according to Article 6 of the bride price regulations, the court will decide the proportion of return according to the time of living together, the use of bride price, the pregnancy situation, etc. The longer the time of living together, the less the return will be, not all in full.

Can't you refund the bride price after getting married?

No. If a marriage is registered but does not live together, a refund may be claimed at the time of divorce (Article 5, paragraph 2, of the (I) of interpretation); if a marriage is registered and living together but the time is short and the amount of bride price is too high, a refund may also be claimed at the time of divorce (proviso to Article 5 of the bride price provisions). “Having obtained the certificate” does not mean “absolutely no refunds.”

Can the money for transferring money and buying gifts during love be counted as a bride price?

No. Betrothal gifts are substantial payments made pursuant to marriage customs with the purpose of establishing a marital relationship; minor gifts given on holidays, birthdays, and everyday consumable expenses do not constitute betrothal gifts (as explicitly excluded by the regulations on betrothal gifts) and cannot be reclaimed upon termination of the relationship.

What evidence is required to support the claim of “financial hardship”?

should provide objective evidence: proof of family income, proof of indebtedness, proof of loan for large expenditures, proof of local minimum living guarantee or poverty, etc., which prove that the local basic living standard cannot be maintained by relying on the existing property after paying the bride price; it is difficult to obtain support only by verbally stating that "difficulties at home.

8. Practical Insights from a Lawyer

Whether or not the bride price can be refunded and how much it can be refunded are actually four things in practice: whether or not to register, whether or not to live together, whether or not the amount of the bride price is high, and whether or not the payer has difficulties in life. Many people struggle with "whether to retire" as soon as they come up, but ignore which situation they belong to first. General gifts during love are not bride price, and it is difficult to ask for expenses such as holiday red envelopes and daily transfers. Therefore, when sorting out, it is necessary to distinguish which money belongs to bride price paid according to customs and which is only emotional exchanges, and do not mix the two accounts together.

Next is the evidence. As far as possible, the payment voucher forms a chain: the transfer record of the bank or payment platform, the notes indicating the purpose, WeChat chat, the testimony of the matchmaker or relatives and friends present, and the cash payment should be fixed in advance. Living together or not also need to prove, rental contract, the same address, different work or separation records are useful. Organize these into a timeline, and then talk about the proportion to have a basis.

The path and the timing must be correct. If you break up without registration, you can generally sue separately for return. For those who have registered but advocate "not living together" or "living difficulties caused by premarital payment", divorce should be taken as the premise. It is better to submit the return request together with the divorce request to avoid being rejected due to incorrect procedures. The amount should be psychologically prepared: it is not black or white, and the court will make a comprehensive discretion based on the time of common life, the actual use of bride price, dowry deduction and fault. When negotiating, first think clearly about your own upper and lower limits, and speak with evidence, it is more likely to get real results than blindly biting the "full amount.

The framework of the rules for the return of the bride price can be summarized as "three must return + two discretionary": three cases of unregistered, unregistered living together, and payment causing difficulties in life should support the return (the latter two cases are conditional on divorce); two cases of registered living together but the time is short and the amount is too high, and unregistered living together, according to the time of common life, pregnancy, fault of both sides, etc. discretionary proportion. Practical suggestions to the parties concerned: the payer shall keep the bank transfer records and remarks of the bride price, and avoid paying large amount of bride price in the form of cash, WeChat red envelopes and other difficult-to-prove ways; The recipient retains dowry and joint consumption vouchers as the basis for deduction in the return dispute. In case of disputes, the three accounts of "common living time + gestation + dowry deduction" shall be calculated first, then rationally put forward the demand for return proportion-neither believe the rumor of "full refund", nor mistakenly think that "get the certificate and sit back and relax".